Much overdue

I am horrible. I will admit it. This past Monday, was the 5 year anniversary of my father passing away. I was 17. He was 61. I meant to post then, but my brain completely blanked it out (and I had been saving this post for about 2 weeks!). So, I will ramble about him now:

*Dad would eat ice cream out of the box with a fork. Who is sneakier than dad? His kids of course! My mom once caught a couple of the older sibs sitting behind the couch (hiding) with a box of ice cream and forks in their hands. They knew that Dad would probably catch the blame, since the fork in the ice cream was his trademark. Now, if I eat ice cream out of the box, I eat it with a fork...

*Dad was very possessive of his stuff. Very. After he passed away, my mom found a sleeping bag (of surprisingly low quality), still in the package, with a note on the outside. "Dad's! Do NOT Touch!" He had never even opened the packaging to use the sleeping bag, but was adamant that no one touch it without his permission. (Mom was very bitter and angry when she found that sleeping bag, and she wanted to go to the cemetery and leave it on his grave. I think my brother managed to talk her out of it, especially since we know the Cemetery Sexton... ) I think I get the possessiveness of stuff from him. There are times when I freak out if someone touches my stuff, and afterwards I realize it and think, "NO! I don't want to be like him! Stop, stop, stop, stop, STOP!"

*Dad was diabetic, had cancer twice (the second round of Hodgkin's Lymphoma got him), had heart failure (I think he had either a triple or quadruple bypass when I was a kid), high blood pressure (then again, who doesn't?!), and the list goes on and on and on. In the last few days of his life, all his organs failed, his blood pressure sky-rocketed, and then he passed on. He was always sick when I was growing up, and his death wasn't a shock to any of us. The annoying thing was people kept telling us, "Oh, we're so sorry for your loss." We weren't. He was always sick, and had moved on to a better place. Besides, we were ready to move on too. (I remember coming home from camping trips, and we knew dad was ok if we could see light from the TV through the front window. It was weird to come home to a dark quiet house after he passed away. Really weird.)

*Dad had a really bizarre of humor. I remember hanging out with my best friend, The Boy in high school (The same Boy that I am dating now). We had just gotten out of school for the day, and I wanted to change clothes quick, before we were going to hang out. I left The Boy in the kitchen with dad, and thought not much could happen in the 30 seconds I needed to change. As I was coming back down the stairs from my room I heard my dad say, "Would you like a shot?" (Diabetic...) and as I came around the corner, I could see that The Boy's eyes had gotten big. My dad was offering The Boy a shot of insulin. (FYI, The Boy was a hippy child, and stoner in high school. Dad thought drugs were totally up his alley...*eye*roll*...) He thought it was hilarious, and I was annoyed with him for trying to kill off my friends...

*One thing I inherited from Dad is my love for reading, and hoarding books like a mad-person. His office had a lot of books. From religious, to homeopathic stuff, to Robert Ludlum. He had a surprisingly awesome variety. As a kid I would read late into the night, and if I finished my book and wasn't quite ready for bed, I would sneak down to his office. I wasn't allowed to borrow his books, but I did anyway. I just made sure to always take the hardbound ones, and leave the dust-jacket in it's place, disguising my sneakiness. Buwahahahaha. Also, on the nights that I couldn't sleep, I would go watch late night re-runs of Mash with him. There were times that two of my brothers and I would end up watching TV with him, because we... A) couldn't sleep, B) heard the TV and C)Watching TV at midnight on a school night was obviously better than laying awake in bed waiting to fall asleep.

*The summer that I got my drivers license, I was working at a scout camp about an hour away from where I grew up. The weekend after getting my license, I wrecked my car. I was driving down a dirt road way too fast, slid out, and drove into the mountain side(hey, it was either the mtn or the river!). I got out, checked everything, mentally said "Screw it. I'll continue on home, worry about it then" and went on my way. When I got home, I was scared shiiiiiiitless about telling the parental units. Dad said hi to me, and he started our conversation with, "So, I had a near-death experience this week..." Blah, blah blah, I don't remember what he went to the hospital for, but it gave me the perfect opener for my near-death experience. Surprisingly, he wasn't mad about the car. He would get mad if we didn't do the dishes when he wanted us to, but didn't get angry about me knocking the damn engine of my car off of it's mounts. Surprised the crap out of me...

All in all, my childhood wasn't that bad (compared to others), it was actually pretty good. I have a lot of happy memories, and like anyone, enough of the not-so-happy memories. Every once in a great while, I'll have a day where I really miss him. But mostly I have gotten over it. I have moved on, and life is really good right now. Mom still has her hard times, and after dad's death got into exercising, because she didn't want to die the same way he did. She now raises money with Team in Training. Over 75% of the money she raises goes to Leukemia and Lymphoma reserach, the support of patients, and the support of patients families. Check out her current page here. Mom has completed numerous marathons, triathalons, and cycling races with TNT. She is currently training for a hike in the Grand Canyon, which is a new event for TNT. Someday when I am no longer a poor-starving-college-student I will do my first event with them. I'll let you guys know ;)



(Also, I was trying to find a pic of dad to add to this post. I'm at work, and all my the pics are at home, but I'll get one up!)